This is out 14th Valentine's Day as a married couple. Technically it should have been our 20th. Troy and I met on a blind date in 199O. He was my first serious relationship...I was 2 months shy of my 19th birthday. I had only had 3 "dates" my entire time in highschool and all 2 of them were for major school dances and the 3rd for a movie. I had only been kissed once and that wasn't until late my senior year. I spent my time wondering what was wrong with me...my twin sister had boyfriends constantly since grade school and married a month after graduation. I cried a lot. I was miserable. I had friends, mostly those that also attended our church...both girls and guys...but we were all just friends. I was in the top 3 of our class and carried a 4.0 grade point average. I was in band, math league, was photographer for the yearbook and newspaper...I was one that someone came to if they wanted to copy my assignments...I was in National Honor Society and received an honor diploma at graduation..but what I wasn't was someone that anyone wanted to date. I felt unattractive. After graduation, I attended college, but only for a short time. It wasn't that I wasn't smart enough, I scored high on the ACT and had college paid for. I was headed toward veterinary school. My panic got worse..I was having blackouts, severe anxiety in classes, and nightmares. I kept going at this point.
My friend that I had known since before I could even walk set me up on a blind date with someone her boyfriend worked with. We went for dinner and bowling...it was awesome! And...I was in love...
My anxiety at school got worse. I dropped to night classes for accounting and eventually drooped out completely. I was working at a new local restaurant and ended up as shift manager in 1991. Troy and I started planning our wedding for the next February. During the fall of 1991, everything fell apart...I broke my vow to myself and ended up afraid that I was pregnant (I wasn't). Word got back to my parents through a long line of people. Troy ended up being accused of a number of things (none ended up being true), I was forced to break up with him and was taken to counseling. I wanted to die! We both went our separate ways..kind of. A couple of months later I started dating someone I worked with and within a short few months, we were engaged. We were married in October of 1992. We had 2 kids, and after a very rocky 5 1/2 years or so, we divorced in May of 1998. Through a strange turn of events between Troy's sister and my ex-husband, I was put back in touch with Troy. I met him for lunch during the summer of 1998 and it was like we started back where we had left off nearly 6 years earlier.
We married in February of 1999. We had our youngest in 2000 and Troy adopted my 2 oldest in May of 2003. Things haven't been easy, we lost a baby, lost our home in a tornado, Troy lost his job among a long list of everyday difficulties. We've fought, we've yelled and we've said things to each other that are hurtful. We've been broke, we've had our utilities shut off and we've been short on food. So far, we've survived. I believe there is a purpose in everything that we have to face...good and bad. It still doesn't make it any easier though. Through everything, Troy as stood by me, he has never left. He works hard with rarely a complaint. I know its not easy to live with me, and even in those times when my problems get the best of me, he's always there. I Love him dearly. And, honestly can't imagine our lives any different.
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